Three into two does not go.
With Southampton already relegated, come 19:00 BST on Sunday, two of Everton, Leeds and Leicester will be contemplating trips to Plymouth, Ipswich and Millwall in the Championship next season, while the survivor will toast a great escape.
So, on the eve of a critical final day of the Premier League season, we asked our fan writers for their heartfelt pleas to their heroes as they battle to stay in the division.
Mike Richards, Unholy Trinity
I've started writing this piece countless times before eventually accepting the words that truly express our feelings heading into Sunday.
Overwhelming anxiety and apprehension are the only way to describe our current psychological state.
Asking fellow Evertonians what the club means to them, feelings range from unrelenting affection to relentless misery.
The love for our club is what makes the misery of our current plight so heightened.
The golden years of the 1980s were, quite simply, the pinnacle of our club's existence.
Since those glittering days there has been a fairly steady decline, including numerous flirtations with relegation. That decline has rapidly accelerated over the past two seasons, as our current boardroom custodians are responsible for what can only be described as complete mismanagement.
Relegation battles are becoming a habit. You can only go so long before the inevitable happens. The ramifications would be vast and, without meaning to sound arrogant, outweigh the impact on both Leeds and Leicester.
It was said this week that if Everton go down, it would be the biggest relegation of the Premier League era. It's hard to disagree.
Players and staff know by now what this club means to us. They know what we have done for them over the past two seasons as well.
We are loyal, proud and have constantly shown we have the stomach for the fight.
We will be here, whatever the weather, whoever is wearing the shirt and whoever is sitting in the dugout. However, it is time to cash in some of our adoration. We need some payback.
Quite simply, it's do or die. It's fight or flight. It's win at all costs.
FIGHT. FOR. US.